OMG! You killed
by Oberon
Summary: Ever wonder is Kasumi really such a nice person... or is it just a mask for something much more sinister...


Oh My God, You killed...  
  
  
  
  
Everyone has a secret and Ranma Saotome is no exception. No, not  
that secret, everyone knows he's a part time girl.  
  
"Let me get this straight. Just because Akane made demon beef  
stew then forced it down my throat, I have to be your slave?"  
Ranma asked the long haired woman dumbly.  
  
"That's right Ranma-kun," Ranma's supposed master replied while she  
casually chopped away at something on the kitchen counter.  
  
Ranma paused, he ran over what the woman had just said one more time  
in his head. If it was some big angry looking beast with furs  
and whiskers Ranma would have been inclined to believe her, but  
this is...  
  
"Bwuhahahahaha, you got to be kidding me Kasumi." The pigtailed  
martial artist had this stupid look on his as he laughed. Oh, he  
had no doubt that the stew that Akane fed him was made from  
demon beef. There's no surprise there. What was really cracking  
him up was the joke sweet innocent Kasumi played on him. Come on,  
the sweet innocent and couldn't hurt a fly Kasumi is really a  
ruling class demon lord in disguise? Who would believe that?  
  
"It's true. I am a ruling class demon lord in disguise."  
Harmless Kasumi brushed the diced carrots into a bowl. All the  
while she was listening to Ranma's hysterical laughter in the   
background.  
  
"HeHeHeHeHe...He... .... He..." Ranma couldn't tell but he could  
have sworn the wood pattern on the cabinet doors just changed into  
a face and hissed at him. But it was gone so quickly, it's just  
gotta be a hallucination. It has to. "Hmm... is that a cold chill  
crawling up my spine?" Ranma's idle thought was suddenly interrupted   
by a horrifying roar that was more fearsome than a cat's meow.  
  
Ranma's skin suddenly turned pale white. Kasumi's face... it  
wasn't all that different, she was just snaring at him, but for  
some reason it was scaring Ranma half to death.  
  
"INSOLENCE!" Ranma jumped back three feet in surprise and landed in a   
defensive posture. The voice seemed to have growled the word from every   
direction. But the voice was silenced just as Kasumi's hateful stare   
softened. "You don't believe me Ranma-kun?" she asked with as much   
sweetness in her voice as always.  
  
Ranma had that stupid smile on his face again. "Com'on Kasumi,  
stop kiddin' around."  
  
"I see, so you need some proof."  
  
Just at that moment Akane wondered into the kitchen.  
  
"Kasumi, do you need help with dinner?" Akane asked completed  
oblivious to what had just gone on.  
  
Akane had just enough time to notice the uncharacteristic evil  
smile on her sister's face before she exploded in a shower of  
blood and gore.  
  
Akane's blood splattered across Ranma's face but he hardly  
noticed. Ranma's mouth hung open in shock and surprise. The look  
of shock stayed on his face for a good 10 seconds before he  
gasped. The sudden disturbance in the air from Ranma's sharp  
intake disturbed the perfectly balanced skeleton that is all  
that's left of Ranma's fiancée.  
  
The still blood drenched skeleton fell apart and landed on a neat  
pile with the skull on top.  
  
"You believe me now?" Sweet Kasumi asked like she didn't just  
make her sister explode.  
  
Still in shock over the death of his fiancée the only words that  
the pigtail martial artist uttered were, "Oh My God! You kill  
Akane, you bitch!"  
  
"Yes, and if you ever want to see her again you'll do exactly as  
I say."  
  
Ranma clenched his fist as rage raise from the depths of his  
soul.  
  
"I'LL KILL YOU!" Ranma struck, landing a punch that would  
penetrate steel across Kasumi's cheeks. He was about to sent a  
second fist at his fiancée's murderer when the same disembodied  
voice from earlier chuckled from all around him.  
  
Kasumi, head still tilted to the side from the punch, straighten  
up to look Ranma in the eye. Beside from a light bruise that was  
clearing up quickly the ruling class demon lord in disguise  
appear unharmed.  
  
"Ahum, like I said, if you do my bidding I will bring Akane back  
to life."  
  
Ranma just got over the terrifying chuckle that was worse than a  
cat's meow when Kasumi's words registered.  
  
"You can do that?" the pigtail martial artist asked dumbly with  
Akane's blood still on his face.  
  
"But first you must promise to do what I say."  
  
Ranma pushed down his rage. For Akane's love he's willing to do  
anything, even be a slave to a ruling class demon lord disguised  
as the loving Kasumi Tendou.  
  
"Deal." Ranma's answer was brisk and devoid of any doubt.  
  
"Excellent." Kasumi snapped her fingers and magically the blood  
and pieces of body parts that was splattered on the walls and  
floor lifted off like iron collecting around a powerful magnet.  
At the same time Akane's bones began to rejoin itself into a  
complete skeleton with the same pose as before. The last ounces  
of blood on Ranma's face flew into the giant ball of gore that  
had collected in the middle of the room. The ball dropped with  
the force of gravity, which it had defied up to this point, on  
the complete skeleton. The bones and soft tissues merged and in  
a moment Akane was back in one piece complete with the marital  
arts gi she had on.  
  
Ranma's reassembled fiancée took a breath like her insides didn't  
just explode. But she did notice something was wrong - she just  
didn't know what. She looked at evil demon Kasumi in confusion.  
  
"No thanks Akane, dinner is almost ready." Kasumi snapped back  
like she would normally do whenever Akane asked to help.  
  
"Oh, Ok." Akane walked off with the strange sense of déjà vu.  
(You really think this is first time Kasumi blew her up?)  
  
Now that Akane was out of ear shot Ranma turned back to the  
demon. "So wha'do ya wan'?"  
  
"I want you to get something for me." Kasumi returned to  
preparing the dish as she talked.  
  
Ranma scratched the back of his head trying to figure out what  
the demon wanted. From out of nowhere something occurred to him.  
"You wan' me to pick up sake from the store?"  
  
"No Ranma-kun. I want something much harder to get."  
  
= = = = = = = = = =  
  
He had guarded what is inside this cave far longer than he could  
remember. All this time, no one had ever come to claim what is  
inside. No one was stupid enough, until now.  
  
"Alright old man, where's the thingy that resurrects ruling class  
demon lords in disguise?" the voice of the brash martial artist  
echoed from the cave opening.  
  
The bolding and overfed man looked up from his 2ft height  
into the blue eyes of Ranma Saotome who stood over him.  
  
"Ah, company." the old man smiled, revealing this rotted teeth.  
"But as much as I would enjoy your presence I suggest you leave.  
Now."  
  
Ranma grinned at the old man's stature. "Ha, just another Happi.  
I can handle that."  
  
"Boy, you should leave while you can." The old fat man told Ranma  
while he placed a piece of leaf between his blackened teeth. He  
began to chew on the leaf which made this annoying squishy/crunchy   
sound.  
  
Ranma tried to grab the rags on the man to talk some since into him.   
But he quickly found that he was holding on to empty space. The old   
gnome was standing 3 feet beyond his reach.  
  
"You're fast for someone so young." The bold gnome commented with  
an amused smirk. "But still can't let you get the Demonic-Stone-  
That-was-Once-a-Skin-Tumor-on-Demon-King-Ozzy-Osbourne ((tm))."  
The old man had to take a deep breath before he could finish the  
last sentence.  
  
"Yeah, that's the think I want."  
  
"Let's see if you can get it then."  
  
The two fought. Not really, it was mostly Ranma avoiding the  
gnome's chi attacks. The old gnome in the last salvo sent out 3  
chi blasts side by side. Ranma managed to jump out of the way  
but he couldn't get close as another was heading straight for his  
head. He twisted out of the way and landed on a rock.  
  
After almost an hour of this Ranma was beginning to get winded  
and the worst part is he couldn't collect the ambient energy from  
each of the blasts. The old man wasn't even tired. Ranma knew  
if this keeps up he was going to loose without getting within 20  
feet of the old man.  
  
Ranma jumped up just as the rock beneath him exploded, sending  
pieces of jagged rocks to his side. Ranma yelped as one of the  
rocks stabbed him in the ass. He twisted away from a chi blast  
only to find himself in the path of another. Miraculously Ranma  
managed to avoid that blast as well. Still in midair Ranma  
gathered his Chi and fired a Mouko Takabisha only to have it  
absorbed by the gnome with a casual gesture of the hand.  
  
Ranma landed hopping on one let. His ass hurt like hell but he  
wasn't through yet. He pulled out the spike of rock and threw it  
aside. He took the time to swear an obscenity before he launched  
himself into another round of dodge the chi cannon ball.  
  
Ranma finally got within melee range of the old martial artist.  
He bounced off a branch and prepared to use his meteor kick. But  
before he could land the hit the gnome was in the air right in  
front of his face. Ranma reacted quickly. "Kachuu Ten-"  
  
Ranma was swatted aside like a bug and landed flat on the ground.  
He got up just as the gnome landed with one hand on the ground  
standing upside down. The old man look at Ranma's direction with  
that same amused smile.  
  
"You are skilled, but you punch like a girl." The old gnome  
mocked the pigtailed martial artist.  
  
"Why you..." Ranma was furious when he got on his feet. He was  
breathing heavily and hurting in several places the worst of  
which was his ass.  
  
The old man spit out the mesh that was the leaf then got another  
from under the rages. The squishy/crunchy sound from chewing on the  
fresh leaf was beginning to annoy Ranma.  
  
"I haven't had this much fun in...," the old man was recounting  
the time but even an approximate number eluded him. "let's  
say a long time. But anyway I'll let you came back in a few days  
so we can play again. Bye-bye now." Even while Ranma was  
looking the old man disappeared from his sight.  
  
= = = = = = = = = =  
  
3 months later...  
  
Ranma stood triumphantly over the unconscious gnome. His cloths  
were now as torn and ragged as the gnome's but he was happy. He  
held the watermelon size tumor in one hand while he jumped up and  
down in mirth.  
  
Ranma got all the way to the river on the bottom of the mountain  
before he collapsed from exhaustion.  
  
"Ouch," he muttered this last word then splashed into the water with   
the tumor held tightly. Ranma-chan lay wet and barely conscious on   
the river bank but she still had a stupid grin on her face.  
  
= = = = = = = = = =  
  
"So if I give you this you'll leave Kasumi's body?" Ranma asked  
while holding on to the Demonic-Stone-That-was-Once-a-Skin-Tumor-  
on-Demon-King-Ozzy-Osbourne ((tm)).  
  
"Yes, something like that." The ruling class demon lord in  
disguise replied.  
  
Ranma being the naive person that he is took the demon's word. "Ok,   
here" he handed the tumor that he been lugging across Tokyo.  
  
Kasumi accepted the tumor then immediately held it over her head.  
"Bwuhahahahaha, now I will bring death and destruction to the  
mortal world." It was the same horrid voice that could out-  
compete a cat's meow for fright value. But this time it was  
coming from Kasumi.  
  
Kasumi's jaw unhinged, her mouth stretched wide to accompany the  
huge tumor. She slowly and in a dramatic fashion began to lower  
the tumor mass into her gapping mouth. All the while she was  
laughing in that sickening voice.  
  
Ranma's sweat dropped. "Ok... this may had been a bad idea."  
  
The tumor was inches away from being swallowed whole and Kasumi  
was still laughing. "Hahahaha... grhhhhh..." Her laugh was  
suddenly interrupted by a gurgle.  
  
An arrow had perched Kasumi's throat. It was logged there, jammed   
solidly between to vertebrate. The demon blood flowed freely from   
the two open wounds, one on the front and one on the back.  
  
"Grhhhhh..." Kasumi's mouth quickly shrank back to its original  
shape. She had the look of complete surprise. Her eyes were  
wide open when her nick exploded outward, sending her head flying  
into the air and landing in the sink. The head bounced inside  
the sink a bit but the sides and the fascist was in the way.  
Finally the head was still, Kasumi faced locked forever in the  
final expression of shock.  
  
Ranma looked to the direction the arrow had come from.  
  
"Mom? Oh my God, you killed Kasumi!"  
  
  
  
  
  
So what do you think? Should I continue this? 


End file.
